For shame if you thought this comic was random.

And I'm back! Sorry I ran off like that, but I just had to know the secret of pirate squirrels and I'm sure Minion spoiled this for everyone so there'd be no suspense.

As for the secret of being a pirate squirrel? It's as follows:

1. Be a squirrel.
2. Own a pirate hat.

So all in all, it's pretty simple. I can see why he wanted to keep it a secret. When something is so easy that anyone can do it, it stops being special once everyone copies it.

Fortunately for the pirate squirrel, I promised not to tell anyone the secret, so he doesn't have to worry about...huh. I guess I sorta... whoops.

Um, if anyone needs me, I'm going to go find a squirrel ninja. I think I'm gonna need a bodyguard after this...